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I've come hoping you can help me, I'm not sure you can, I feel so silly but I also feel so?so?" Desperate?" the old man suggested."Yes, desperate. It's my husband, Carroll. He's a good man, that is, he has a loving heart and in his own way he loves me but he's very unhappy. He feels as if he's a woman trapped in the body of a man. He's seen a psychiatrist and a gender disorder specialist and they agree he's suffering from a gender identity disorder. They've both suggested he enroll in a pre operative transsexual program and get the treatment he needs to determine if he really wants to be a woman." Leslie paused here and began crying softly. The old man guided her backwards to a chair that wasn't there a moment before and helped her sit down. Another chair appeared and he sat down near her. He held her hand and waited for her to stop crying.When she had regained her composure, the old man spoke."But he won't enter the program because of his parents, am I right?" Yes, he confessed to. But this time not just for him to pass out downstairs, but for my familys future. I prayed for my son Luke that he could grow up into the man that I knew he could be. That he wouldnt be this scrawny timid 17 year old that flinched when someone approached him. I prayed for him to grow up and find a loving wife and have children of his own who thought him their hero. I said a quick prayer for my 16-year-old daughter Annie. I prayed for her to come out of her shell and talk to people, for her to be social like other teenagers. As I heard my husbands footsteps coming closer I said a final prayer for myself knowing that it was useless because God must have forsaken me years ago for this to be my life now. But tonight instead of asking for protection like I always did I asked for something different I asked for it to be over. I asked God to end it. I didnt care how even if it means my husband killing me I just wanted it to be over. My husband slammed open the door and I silently cried. I.
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